It's General Zod in 2008!
His campaign announcement:
Zod kicks off campaign in Philly
PHILADELPHIA (Reuters) -- General Zod launched his 2008 Presidential bid yesterday, greeted by a crowd of over 25,000.
"I am General Zod!" he bellowed, surveying the masses. "Listen to me, people of the Earth! Today I bring a new order to your planet! Your lands, your homes, your possessions, your very lives -- all of this and more you will gladly give to me! In return, I promise you lower taxes and cheap gas prices!"
The promise was met by wild cheers and a fanfare of balloons and confetti.
He continued: "It is as useless for you to deny me your vote as it is for me to annihilate you. You will only bring death and destruction upon yourselves, while I lose the potential products of your labor. In return for your vote, you will have my generous protection! In other words - you will be allowed to live.
"Hear me now! There is now one law, one order, one ruler who alone will determine your collective destiny! Kneel before me! From this day forward - there is only Zod!"
The reception among the crowd was enthusiastic. Said Doris Eddins, 53, of Trenton, "That's my President right there. I hear he's gonna put a lien on my house, but he's promising tax refunds. You hear that? The President's gonna send me a check!"
Zod is expected to make stops in Cincinnati and Indianapolis tomorrow.
I can't say that he sounds that much worse than what we have now.
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posted by Jonathan @ 9:23 PM
Sunday, October 16, 2005
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